As we all know, there was a brutal campaign to support Proposition 8 in California over the past year. We had to sit and watch as advertisement after advertisement scared voters by telling them that their children would have to be taught about us in their schools and that churches would lose their tax-exempt status for discriminating against us. And we had to defend ourselves by saying that wasn't true and that those were just lies and scare tactics. (Instead of saying "HELL, YES!" you have to teach about us and our struggles in schools and that churches need to pay taxes if they are promoting discrimination and/or engaging in political activism.) We even had to watch our own anti-Prop 8 campaigns make statements about how it was okay to not think that same-sex marriage was okay but "you don't want to take away anyone's rights, right?" Fuck you.
This hurts us. It slashes into our souls and makes us hemorrhage. We are left wounded, defeated, and sometimes feel like lying down to die. Straight people - I ask you to think about what it must feel like to have your life, your very existence discussed and debated in an open forum. Forget about the negative, hateful rhetoric for a second. Just think about strangers talking about your life and debating your rights on television. Think about the public being allowed to vote on how you live or what rights you have. This alone is enough to make you feel as though you weren't as good as everyone else. Now add the vitriol and hate - sulfuric acid thrown into an open wound. Think about being told that you are worthless, sick, disgusting, horrible, sinful, nasty, and not even worthy of living. Now think of this happening every single day of your life. You might start to feel just a little angry.
When I hear stories of black transgender women being murdered and the media failing to pick up the story and the white leaders of the LGBT movement failing to speak out against this horrible crime, I feel sick and angry. When I hear stories of a lesbian dying alone in a hospital room with her partner of twenty years and biological children being denied the right to be by her side, I feel sick and angry. When I read a story about a child killing himself because he was ridiculed as suspect of being gay, I cry, and I feel sick and angry.
I get asked why I'm so angry. Now, you know. Please don't ask me to stop screaming and yelling when I hear someone call someone (usually me) faggot or dyke. I know it's not always safe to speak out, but I have to do so. Please understand that if I get pissed because my queer space is invaded by straight people it's because I need, we need sanctuary. And please, please, please don't just give lip service to gay rights and don't just show up at a march. I need for you to get pissed off. We need for you to get pissed off. When you see me start acting crazy and ready to riot, don't tell me to calm down. Pick up a stick. Start screaming like an insane person. And let's scare the hell out of them.
Speak on it, gurl. I feel you.
